On Growing Up

I've wanted to write this post for awhile, but it was never quite right. Today I think it will be.

While growing up, most kids are afraid of something. Some are afraid of spiders, some are afraid of swimming, and some are afraid of dogs. My personal demon was the dark. Everything about the dark--including the potential for what it held--terrified me. Out of all of the things the dark could hide, I was scared of two more than the others--monsters and ghosts.

As I've grown older, the dark has come to be less terrifying, but I've come to realize that monsters and ghosts are real. However, instead of the boogey man, ferocious animals, and disembodied beings, monsters and ghosts are the realities of the choices we've made and life simply happening. Monsters take the form of losing loved ones too early, grey hair at 22, friends being HIV positive, heartbreak, abuse, families falling apart, body image issues that don't go away with adolescence, cancer, voluntarily going to therapy, miscarriages, and emotional breakdowns on a random Tuesday. Everyday we have to deal with ghosts of the past--past relationships, consequences of past choices, and memories (good and bad) of all our favorite places and we can't wipe any of those away. All of these things become a part of us and become what a lot of people like to call "Baggage".

On that note, here's the song of the day: "Your Biggest Mistake" by Ellie Goulding.